Monday, June 19, 2006

connections

2 quick thoughts before I head to bed:

1. Connections. As I drove home tonight and pondered the evening's events, I was thinking about our connections and how interesting it is that when we find a new friend, we will often suddenly find all of their current friends so cool. A person that we just knew by face before suddenly becomes someone that we're connected to, and we're willing to do whatever we can to become better acquainted with them so that we can grow closer to our new found friend. I have many more thoughts on the subject, but I'm afraid that they wouldn't make much sense . . . and they're a bit personal anyhow ;)

2. Wanting. Am I the only one that always wants more? I have many unnecessary possessions, yet I want more. I have music that needs to be listened to, but i want more.
I have friends . . . really good friends . . . yet I want more. I guess that I am feeling a bit of shame for that last one. I have really great friends, but sometimes I overlook them because I'm vying for someone else's attention. Am I the only one that does this? Certainly not, but it still makes me feel a little sad.

1 Comments:

At 7/05/2006 07:39:00 AM, Blogger Geo said...

Did I ever let you read my children's book "Never Satisfied"? I bet you'd like it. It's one I often think of when I or someone I know gets into that mode.

I know how it feels to be wanting more, but gratefully, I'm also learning what it means to want less. I'm finding it easier all the time to let go of things (not people, however, I am getting better at letting go of situations with people, and therefore sometimes, people too, I guess). One of my male friends described my personal style recently as "not fussy", which I took as a great compliment, and I am trying not to apply that to everything. I'm retrenching, cutting back. I've adopted a sort of "use it or lose it" mentality. If I never use it or don't love it, I give it somebody who will. If it stays, then it's because I feel sure that I'm willing to maintain it--give it care and feeding, so to speak. Dust it off, put it out so I can see it and enjoy it. Why am I rambling? I'm trying to approach my relationships/interpersonal experiences in much the same way.

As for connections, I also understand well what you expressed about those. I remember the feelings. Nowadays I find the doing "whatever we can to become better acquainted with them so that we can grow closer" is still true, but my personal boundaries have changed. I'm not quite as obsessive. I can't afford to be. I think I am healthier because of that. Funny what time will do to help straighten out even the most tangeld person (moi).

 

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